3 Things I Do To Improve Self-Love

Nowadays we hear so much about self-care. All of the time, I see on social media the different ways we should take care of ourselves. This usually consist of having some elaborate hygiene routine, staying consistent with a workout plan, reading 50,000 books or watching countless YouTube videos about self-care, and many other things. Honestly, I have had my spew on all of those things. Are any of those the correct way, like they claim to be? Well that all depends on you.

Learning to love yourself is meant to be a personal journey. Sure, you can find sources to help you get started, but nobody can tell you how to love you the best, but you.

Today, I am going to share 3 of my favorite things to do to promote love for myself.

I'm going to start with the heavy hitters. One of the biggest things that I do for myself is take myself out on dates. They are called "Artist Dates". I learned of this idea from a book called The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. It is a really good book about reconnecting with your creativity, your inner artist. One of the things she suggested was to schedule days for yourself to go and do things that your inner artist would love to do. This should spark creativity within you and you'll connect more with yourself by learning what you truly love to do.

I couldn't pass up on this idea because you all know how much I love my schedule. Of course I started actually putting in my calendar when I would go on these Artist Dates. And you know that once it's on my calendar it is set in stone.

Cameron suggests in her book to go on an Artist Date once a week. Of course, life happens and going on these dates once a week may not be easy starting off, but I would definitely suggest working up to that.

When I first started I was doing pretty good with the weekly schedule. I need to get back to doing that. I also need to start adding more activities to do for myself. They don't have to be expensive or extravagant. It can be as simple as staying in and reading your favorite book or watching your comfort show.

Another thing that I do to improve self-love is working out. Yes, I know earlier I said that this is something they are always throwing at us on social media, but I really do find this activity fun and helpful for myself.

Working out may not be for everyone, and that's okay. Finding what works best for you is part of the entire self-love/discovery journey.

For me, working out has boosted my confidence, strength, and my ability to stay consistent. It has also taught me to be kind and gentle towards myself at the same time. Since buying my first gym membership last October, I have stayed pretty consistent. Only missing days due to life getting in the way or family vacations. However, I have slowly learned to not beat up myself about those missed days. I learned that just because you missed that one day, it doesn't mean all of your previous progress just disappears.

Now that doesn't mean I can just miss consecutive days and keep excusing myself. I have learned to stay dedicated to the schedule I created for myself.

One last thing I have learned from my workout journey is that even on the weaker days it still matters that I showed up. Maybe I was fatigued from the day before and didn't get much rest. That next day at the gym could be one of the worst. That doesn't mean I should be mad at myself. I'll just learn to get more rest so I can work harder in the gym. What does matter, though, is that I was there. I stayed consistent with my visits to the gym.

Give yourself credit where it's due. And there is always somewhere that credit is due.

As you all can tell, I love to write. I have been writing recreationally since I was 10 years old. Therefore, I would be crazy if I didn't have this activity as one of my top three things that I do to improve self-love.

Writing not only provides me a better understanding of myself, but it teaches me valuable lessons from my past. There have been many times when I would go back and read something in my journal from like three years ago and I would be reminded of the things that I have experienced. Those past experiences teach me lessons, motivate me, and also reminds me why loving myself is so important.

There was an entry in my journal where I expressed hate towards myself and then a couple of pages later I addressed that hatred and made a written promise to never say that I hate anything about myself again. Rereading that today holds so much power and importance for me. It reminds me why I focus so much on continuous improvement.

I strive to be a little bit better than the person I was the day before, And throughout that journey, I always remember to enjoy myself, do things that I love, and be happy. Saying that you hate something about yourself can be extremely dangerous, and I think the 20 or 21 year old version of me understood that.

Now I have an even stronger knowledge on how the words we speak hold detrimental value. I am more accepting of myself and patient with the person I am becoming. Because of that reminder I wrote, I am more careful with my words and how I feel towards myself. I treat my inner artist like a child. I wouldn't want to say anything that makes him feel small or unworthy of love.

I could really create an entire blog post on all of the benefits there are in writing. However, I will save that for another time.

Of course there are other things I do that reinforce my love for myself, but that will start to venture into the realm of self care routines which I am sure you all have already been exposed to.

Before I end this post, though, there is one last thing that came to mind, so I suppose this is the fourth thing that helped improve my perception of self-love.

The love I have for myself improved tremendously when I began to strengthen my relationship with God. The more I loved Him, I began to learn just how much He loves me. Thus, making it easier for me to love me too.

I am constantly learning so much just by reading his Word. And I have come to realize that there is no one that exist that will love me as much as He does. If God can look at me with love, then why can't I?

I hope this post encourages you readers to be kinder to yourselves and to find the things that bring you joy. Find the things that truly speak to your soul. We all have an inner artist inside of us that we need to nurture. Don't put yourself down when life isn't going smoothly. Learn to love who you are.

Until the next post.

Jefferson K. Coe